Chef colleagues and friends understand how difficult it is to manage both work and a relationship especially when your job is so demanding
I Do...Chef!Chef colleagues and friends understand how difficult it is to manage both work and a relationship especially when your job is so demanding.
Let's face it, the hospitality industry can be brutal at times. Partners of chefs generally seem to instantly understand each other's experiences.
You see, when it comes down to it, you have to live the life to understand it. Being a chef is a very tall order. We think it must be even harder to be married to one, so here is a list of things we feel anyone married to a chef of thinking about it should know:
- You have got to have your own life. Having your own identity is essential in every relationship but being independent is even more critical when you are married to a person who you will hardly ever see - you will be alone most of the time. Chef's do not work sociable hours.
- Approach Valentines and special occasions like a single person, look the other way. Special occasions are when chefs work. You will stand alone under the mistletoe and New Year's Eve will find you alone. Guaranteed.
- There is nothing glamorous about being a working restaurant chef. Forget what you see on TV, real chefs have long, tough hours day in and day out and come home smelling from anything from smoke, to onions to fish.
- Most chefs have no desire to cook at home - we do not come home and whip you up your favourite meal after cooking for most of the neighbourhood.
- We talk about amuse bouche in our sleep. Or waiters picking up the orders, or new menus or just food.
- We work long hours everyday. This is not an occasional late night in the office. This is daily hard, rough and tough back-breaking hours that would make cowards cry.
- It takes a long time in the trenches and most chefs never get to seniority. If you are looking for fame, marry an already famous movie star to go on Jerry Springer - you won't get rich quick marrying a chef.
- We really don't feel like talking about "feelings" when we get home at 2.00am - we will try as best as possible, but sometimes, we will just start snoring.
- Do not call us in service unless it is important. No we cannot just disappear from the kitchen during service to talk for 10 minutes.
- You will be criticised for your cooking as if you were a rookie apprentice commis chef. We just can't help it sometimes.
- Do not get in our way in the weeks leading up to a new menu or months leading up to a restaurant or hotel opening. Really bad idea.
- We tend to be a little cocky. It comes with the territory. Even female chefs. Female chefs kick ass!
- If you think that your life will consist of restaurant food daily, think again. You will eat dinner alone at least 5x per week. And breakfast.
- If we do the grocery shopping, expect the bill to be much higher than if you did it alone. Yes we must buy that expensive carton of French cream and no, we cannot substitute. That applies for every basic ingredient. Forget about home economics, we are expressing our love.
So, in short, the partner of a chef is likely to be a great person who brings balance and stability to a chef's life. If you can handle it, we promise you the ride of your life, no two days will be the same and life will never be boring; have fun!